Casual Attire

I had a day with just me and Mason and we decided to go to the movies, which is a treat for both of us. It was a late afternoon movie and we got there early to make sure we go tickets.

True to form, Mason told me that he had to go to the bathroom when we got there, so we walked in to the mens room.

As I am standing there I notice something interesting

Me - "Mason, are you wearing any underwear?"

Mason - "Well, this is kind of embarrassing"

"I'm going commando!!!!"

Me - "It's 2:30, did you wear any today?"

Mason - "Nope, I guess not"

My Son......the dog

When we were potty training Mason, one of the ways that worked for us was to let him go pee in the backyard. It worked well and he learned when to pee. He still loves to pee in the backyard. That's fine.

When we decided to start Ben on the potty training path, we thought it would be a good idea to try the same approach.....We THOUGHT

A few days ago we are in the backyard and Ben, who was in diapers, tells us that he made a doody. So I told him that we need to go inside to change him. He said "no", but I told him that he can not play outside with a doody in his diaper. He response was not what I wanted.

Ben - "The doody is not in my diaper"

Me - "What!?!?!?"

Ben - "I made a doody in the backyard"

Sure enough, Ben went behind a little bush and did the squat. I think the backyard training should be left to animals and when we move the training inside, I will not use the newspaper technique

The F Word

Well, It finally happened.....Mason used the f word for the first time.

He had just come back from a playdate and he was telling me all about it, including how he got to play the Wii, or at least tried to.

So the story goes.

Mason - "Daddy, we were trying to play the Wii, but there was only one remote".

Me - "That's too bad"

Mason - "yeah the fuggin(how he said it) cleaners must have moved it"

I asked him to repeat himself a few times just to make sure what he was saying.

As he tells it, he learned it from his buddy who learned it from his daddy.

Well, at least he used it in the proper context

The Candyman

So Ben is two years old now ( A little older then two) and this is what happened this evening.

The family is just hanging out this evening and Ben decides to put his hands down his pants. The following is the conversation

Beth: What are you doing?

Ben: I dunno.

Beth: What do you have down there?

Ben: Candy

(Pulling his hand out of his pants and pretending to eat candy)

Ben: It's yummy...Want some Mommy?

Beth: No thanks (trying really hard not to laugh, but failing)

(Ben puts his hands down his pants again and pulls them out again)

Ben: Want some Daddy? It's yummy!!!

Me: No Thanks ( not evening trying to hold back the laughter)

So my two year old already has a pickup line? "Hey, I have candy in my pants...want some...it's yummy." Something tells me that would end badly.

Potty Time

It's been a very long time since my last post....The boys are just taking all my time....

Anyway, Ben has found the potty interesting and wants to at least sit on it. There has been no activity yet, but we have made the first step. Here is where it gets interesting. In order for him to want to sit on the little potty, he has to take offf his pants AND his shirt. It's kind of like that episode of Sienfeld where George takes off his shirt, but in this case Ben likes to be totally naked.

Let's hope this is just a phase. I would hate for this to continue when he gets to college

Now THAT is a Shadow Puppet

The evening was going like any other..Dinner, playtime and then time for a bath (for the kids).

I can not say how much the boys like taking a bath or tubby as we like to call it. Mason takes a great deal of pride in how fast he can get ready for the bath. The clothes come flying off and he is ready to jump in to the tub before the water is even turned on.....but not this evening.

Today, Mason quickly got ready for the bath while I was slowly getting Ben ready for the tub. I turn around and there is Mason standing in the hall, with his legs set wide apart and his head is focused on the floor. He's just standing there...focused.

I look at him and ask what is going on and the response....I'm looking for the penis shadow....Yes, I said that correctly. The light from the floor is casting a shadow on the floor and he sees his arms, legs and head.....now is is contorting his waste to find the penis shadow.

Some days you just have to scratch your head and keep on walking........

One of those days

It's been several months since my last post....long winter, not much to write about.


All that changed today and I do need to give a warning...this is all potty humor....real serious potty humor.

Imagine you had a pair of pants and there was a hole in the pocket. You kept putting coins in the pocket and it would run down your leg and on to the floor.....well, instead of a pocket it's a diaper and instead of a coin, it's shit!!! Yes, that is the scene Ben created today. Now, the stomach bug has been going through the house and Ben seems to have it the worst (poor little guy).

So here I am playing with the boys upstairs and I guess I did not smell anything. After a while, all you can smell is doody. You can dunk my head in perfume and I still think I would just smell poo......Anyway I see Ben run in to my room and I notice the back of his pants are all wet. Now, my first reaction was, when did he sit in something wet, followed by be second reaction that happened 2 seconds after the first. That second reaction went something like this, "Oh dear, oh no, oh yes....that is in fact crap running down his leg. By the time I go to him, it came out the pant leg. The best way to describe it is the scene in Shawshank where he was dumping dirt down his leg in the yard while digging the tunnel.

Anyways, I have just thrown out the rug in our bedroom, washed my hands for the 31st time today scratch my head in wonder. What will be next with the adventures of my two boys. The joy never ends....maybe one day I can actually take time to smell the rose....hopefully they do not smell like shit!!!!!